Every now and then I allow myself to be dramatic. Right now? It's necessary. Too much at once and what's a little disappointment. Just a moment of weakness....

It Would Be Me

So at the time that you wanted to be with yourself,
It was me that was understanding and committed to your health.
Never wondering why or how can be listed as attributes to my strengths,
but somehow you managed to switch and up the stakes.
I never really doubted all you said but your actions shed the light on my mistake and now I'd say...

It would be me dealing with the walls you've instilled,
crushing all that stood near or tried pull through
and I'm ashamed that I'd let you do this but most of all,
It would be me that would suffer as you drive on.

Affected you, Pushing Me

So don't expect me to just go on with this situation,
never feeling what my end has endured just to feel you out.
Thinking I can walk aside you and listen to your thoughts,
forgetting it's me you are talking to.

And yes, you are correct
to think your answer couldn't be more direct.
I feel like I've joined a losing battle, and it's not even mine...

Affected you, pushing me
what's left of you is all I see and I'm weakened by your means to recovery
It's affecting me more than you can see, how long should it have to be?
For you to see...what's affecting you is pushing me

Is it that hard for your eyes to be fixed forward,
it's not like it was hard you for you to kill.
Why'd you let me in, thinking that I can win, to just see myself become what I hate most!!!

Affected you, pushing me
what's left of you is all I see and I'm just dying to hear you say,
It's affecting me and it's pushing you. Don't walk away, I'm here for you

Taking Rain

I can't see your face, I can only hear your movement
I can't look into your soul, I can only feel your heart
What is it about the way you see me?
To you, I am everything

Takin my hand into yours, wondering when it'd start to pour
Seein my world turn day and night
Doin the things you do, takin me down to you
To me, you are something worth living for

Feeling the rain on your skin, letting it all sink in
failing to see where the night may lead me
Forget the sun in the sky, I wanna feel you inside
Taking this rain with me is all I wish for you to see

Walk into my eyes, look into my love
Tell me now, what my come?
Let's ride this cloud down, though it may fade away
Let's see the smile now, though it may fade away
Don't just turn away...

Takin this rain on me, let it be what it may be
Take it all away, it couldn't mean a thing...

Feeling the rain pass away, watching as the clouds fade away
lost at where it should be
Feeling the sun in the sky, I can see your eyes
Took the rain with me, for me, just to be

Fixed

Could you speak louder than what you feel?
What's your story and is it real?
Where could we go to sit and talk?

Nothing around us can be seen,
Presently speaking, it's you and me.
Tell me what is it you seek?

The man said, " Look above and down below,
commence your search on to the fold.
Where did you start and where would it go?"

All these roads either right or left,
and these tests I do confess are rather tedious, rediculous
and your manifest I could careless.

Your mind is not the same,
young man don't point the blame for your actions were all true.
Reasoning points you...

Wanting To

Could it be any harder? Trying, building, living with my fear. My eyes are open wide yet I only perceive black and white as the monochromatic kaleidoscope predicts my past and relives my future. How vague and impersonal life can be without color or representation that exists not only in our imagination but in a single touch as well. "Jump!" he proclaimed, "Jump into the abyss for it yields the decision to uphold your dream and see it turned into reality...and it will become you." There was silence, no wind, no whistle, and no thought. I remember seeing my breath and the feeling of ice form on my face from my perspiring. I followed him through the moonlit pathway where the dead trees leaned towards my fate, guiding my soul to the memoirs of my success and my failures. Beggars surrounded me pleading for their fortunes through each step of the narrow road. "It's fucking cold here" I thought to myself, "It's endless winter." Time to wake up son, it's time to move backwards.

From My Voice to Your Heart

Truth in voice and heart cannot cease you,
Witness the change in season and always feel my pulse.
Nevermore shall I resist emotion and tears that may drown my very thoughts to honor you,
My voice shall not be enough so my movement shall prove otherwise.

How can I feel my heart when It no longer resides in me?
I fear the wind has robbed me of my rythym as I sway.
Do not fear to pull my levitated state back onto sheets where we lay,
I shall welcome you, always.

Affectionate lips whisper your mark as the breeze raises my skin,
Powerless and weak is my body compared to your touch-never shall you let me go.